Rewriting the Parenting Playbook: Celebrating the Wins That Others Might Overlook
I’ve spent countless hours sitting on the floor with parents, talking them through their daily journey—the exhaustion, the fears, the small victories, and the heavy weight of expectations. There is no book that applies to these situations, no universal guide that tells parents how to navigate the complexity of raising a child with special needs or medical challenges. Each family writes their own story, often in real time, often with a mix of hope and uncertainty.
Redefining Success in the Real World
Some parents are all in for the developmental differences, fully embracing their child’s unique journey. Others desperately want to change the outcomes, working tirelessly to push progress forward. And some find a balance, accepting where their child is while still holding space for growth. There’s no right way—only the way that works for each family in their own reality.
I’ve met parents who can’t even begin to think about therapy goals because they’re just trying to survive the day. Some judge themselves harshly for not ‘doing enough,’ while others find peace in letting go of expectations. I see them. I sit with them. I remind them that survival is an achievement, too.
Maybe success is a child who finally sleeps through the night after years of struggles.
Maybe it's a first taste of a new food without gagging.
Maybe it’s a trip to the grocery store without a meltdown.
Maybe it’s a word spoken after months of speech therapy.
Maybe it’s simply making it through the day.
These moments matter. And they are worth celebrating.
Letting Go of Comparison
I see the pain in parents’ eyes when they talk about the birthday parties where their child plays alone, the school performances they sit through while other children sing and dance effortlessly. The weight of comparison is heavy. It’s easy to feel like the world measures your child against a standard they were never meant to meet.
But when we stop measuring our children against others and instead focus on their unique progress, we create space for joy. We begin to appreciate the beauty in their personal journey, without the weight of comparison.
Teaching Others to Celebrate With Us
One of the hardest parts of this journey is feeling like no one else understands what counts as a victory. A casual “Is she walking yet?” from a well-meaning friend can sting when you’ve spent months in physical therapy working on balance and strength.
Part of rewriting the parenting playbook is helping others see the progress we see. We can share our children’s wins—no matter how small—so that others can learn to celebrate them too. Maybe our family members don’t know that using a communication device to request a favorite toy is just as exciting as a spoken word. Maybe our friends don’t realize how huge it is when our child tolerates a haircut without distress.
By telling our stories, we invite others into our world and help shift the narrative around what achievement looks like.
Finding Joy in the Unexpected
Sometimes, the most profound moments of progress are the ones we never saw coming. The spontaneous giggle from a child who rarely laughs. The unprompted hug from a sensory-avoidant child. The first time our child responds to their name.
When we stop looking for milestones on a predetermined timeline and instead focus on the present moment, we begin to find joy in the unexpected.
You Are Doing Enough
For every parent feeling exhausted, unseen, or overwhelmed by the weight of expectations—you are doing enough. The fact that you are showing up, advocating, and celebrating your child’s unique journey is a testament to your love and dedication.
So let’s rewrite the playbook together. Let’s celebrate the victories that others might overlook, knowing that each step forward—no matter how small—is worth recognizing. Because in this journey, progress isn’t measured by a chart or a checklist. It’s measured in moments of connection, resilience, and love.
And those are the wins that matter most.
-Amy
